SHAKE IT OFF

A funny thing happens when you start to grow a blog/instagram/social media presence. Strangers will give you praise. And strangers will give you criticism. It's kind of all part of the package deal. There's one in every crowd, and as you grow your reach, there might be many in your crowd.

I'm new to this and attempting to navigate it. I've heard other bloggers/writers talk about how important it is to develop a thick skin. To ignore both the praise and the criticism. If you live for the opinions of others, whether good or bad, you will die. To survive and thrive in a creative industry you must do your best, with what you have, while ignoring the opinions of others.

I'm learning more and more how to allow hurtful things to affect me less and less. I used to get upset when people would copy me. I try to see it more as a compliment now, and less as something that was "stolen" from me. I know that this is just part of the industry, and in the words of T. Swift, I try to just shake it off and move on.

Yesterday, I had a follower on Instagram comment that they were concerned, in all seriousness, that I left the comma off my "hello handsome" card. Minor offense, I know, but it still made me think, laugh, and reflect on it all. It's much, much easier to be cruel online than it is in person, and since online communities are a snapshot of all of humanity, there will always be negative people, as well as people with strong opinions, both online and off. Learning how to navigate it all is just something that comes with the territory.

I want to hear from those that have walked this road longer than me: how do you handle the "noise" of others regarding your work? How do you stay engaged with your craft while disengaging from the negativity and strong opinions of others? Would love to hear your thoughts.  

ROLE MODELS

The city of Seattle is BUZZING with excitement after Sunday's game against the Packers. Super Bowl bound for only the third time in the team's history, everyone here seems to be cheering for this locally loved and historically underdog team, including my friend Kristy's third grade classroom. 

Kristy started her brand new blog (I Just Got Schooled) yesterday with this post here: To The Seahawks From a Thankful Teacher, and it has gone viral. Thanks to social media platforms like Facebook and Twitter, let's just say Kristy's post has reached many. A local Seattle news company is visiting Kristy's classroom this week to interview her and her students. The story is, the teamwork of the Seahawks has inspired and encouraged her third graders to work together, and she tells her first hand account of how her classroom's morale has improved. It's well known that Russell Wilson volunteers at Children's Hospital in Seattle every Tuesday, visiting cancer patients. One of Kristy's students was inspired by this and made a card for another student having a bad day because "Russell Wilson tries to make people's days happier like when he visits the hospital." She tells story after story of how her classroom has been positively impacted by the role models of these football players. 

I'm thankful for quarterbacks who are kind, who give credit to their teammates and even the other team, who take the time to visit children in hospitals. Being Super Bowl bound is great, but impacting a classroom of third graders? I bet Russell would also count that among his proudest achievements. 

The truth is, we all have influence. Whether Seahawks players or not. Let's remember that our actions are also influencing those around us, and live our lives accordingly. 

(NOTE: Let's also acknowledge that there are many football players who are amazing role models, Aaron Rodgers being one of them. I would name more here if I knew more about football. But I know there are lots! No matter what team you root for, let's keep the comments kind.)

HOW TO PLAN A WEDDING IN 3 MONTHS

One of my best friends is engaged (my maid of honor in our wedding) and is in the process of planning her wedding. I love wedding planning, and am over the top excited about this one. I planned my wedding in 3 months, not on purpose, but it just worked out that way for us; a date happened to be available and all our vendors fell into place. I realize this is both rare and hard to do in the age of pinteresty-perfect weddings, and I wanted to offer my best tips for planning a wedding on a short time frame (and on a budget). 

1. Know your vision

For me, this was easy. I had a clear idea of what I wanted the day to look like, from the venue to the flowers even before I started the planning process. I always dreamed of an outdoor wedding at my grandparents' lake house, and our date happened to be available. We booked it immediately, and I could check off the ceremony site, reception site, and wedding date all in one phone call.

2. Get organized

From there, I made lists on lists on lists. The checklist suggested by the knot proved to be too in-depth for me and overwhelming, so I created my own thanks to searches on Pinterest and wedding planning books. I had spreadsheets and highlighters, and I was as organized as I possibly could have been to stay on top of all the details. 

3. Make a decision, and move on

If you are the kind of person to second guess your decisions, now is the time to not do that. With only three months to plan, for each detail, you weigh a few options, make a decision, and move on. Becoming decisive will be your best asset in efficient wedding planning. 

4. Delegate

For tasks that can be completed by other people, ASK THEM. Your bridesmaids are great resources for running errands or helping make DIY projects. Your fiancé will likely feel useless unless you give him specific tasks to complete, even if that just means grocery shopping or doing other errands you don't have time for. Utilize all the help you can get. 

5. Hire a day-of coordinator

When we asked people about their wedding planning experience and their best piece of advice, we'd hear over and over again about those magical day-of coordinators, and the rumors are true. We got married outside and had a completely DIY ceremony and reception, so I knew this was key player for us. We got married in a tiny town in Northern California (population 2,000) and I hired Jodi Drysdale of CES Weddings and Events in the nearest bigger city, and she was the best investment I made for the wedding day. More than just a day-of coordinator, Jodi was an amazing resource that helped me find multiple vendors, went through all the details to make sure I had thought of absolutely everything, and helped our ceremony and reception run smoothy. A good day-of coordinator is my number one recommendation for brides on their wedding day. 

6. Pick a color scheme/theme

Determining your style will give you a framework for planning, everything from your attire to your bridal party, to the food and decor. Our wedding has a rustic/preppy/lakeside feel to it, some of those details played out in navy lace bridesmaid dresses, simple and neutral flowers for the bridesmaids, a giant, loose, mostly neutral bouquet for me, grey suit bottoms for the guys with navy checkered shirts and no jackets, my hair was down, we ate tacos, and danced outside under strands and strands of lights. I loved seeing the vision come to life, and it was so very fitting for us as a couple. I love that there are a thousand ways to have a wedding, and your day gets to be however it works best for you.

7. Have fun

As stressful as it was to pull off really quickly, it was mostly a fun stress. I really enjoy the process of planning for all kinds of parties, so it felt natural to me. If wedding planning just isn't your thing, hire on someone or enlist the help of a friend who loves to do it. The day is really all about your marriage, not the color scheme or the striped straws, and if you can remember that one piece, it will make the whole day much better. See more on how to handle any wedding catastrophe graciously (hello, pouring rain) in this post here.