WHAT YOU REALLY NEED FOR MOTHERHOOD

Everyone is concerned about what baby gear items to get when they register, stocking up on everything from diapers to a car seat, but what about the mom?

No matter how much you were around babies before, (I was a lot, even getting my master's degree in a pediatric field), or how much you've researched or read or prepped and planned, nothing can really prepare you for the day-in-and-day-out experience of being a mom yourself.

It's rewarding, challenging, growing, refining, joyous work and easily my favorite role by far. I wouldn't trade it for anything, even on the toughest days.

Motherhood is a big role. And yet there's no handbook or "registry guide" to follow, even though it encompasses a full-on, major identity and lifestyle shift and you will need a toolbox of things to get you through. You just can't exactly register for them.

But here's what you can stock up on for motherhood:

Patience. For when your baby gets up for the 18th time in the middle of the night, or when you're on your fifth outfit change of the day.

Grace. For everyone. Extra doses for those closest to you (yourself included). We're all just doing the best we can.

Friendship and community. Motherhood can be isolating and you'll need to rely on your home team and that group text thread more than once. Among the texts I have sent this year: "Does anyone have experience NOT giving the antibiotics for an ear infection?" "How long did it take you before you felt like you got the hang of this?" "Play date tomorrow at 10am?" Motherhood, while wonderful, also (at times) is hard. Find your tribe. These friends will be worth more than gold.

Caffeine. If you're into that (like me). See also: wine and chocolate.

Hydration. For all that extra coffee. I often forget to drink water, but when I do I think "I should do this more often." A cute water bottle helps.

Nourishment. In all forms and every sense of the word.

Fresh air, and bonus points for endorphins. Because we all could use a little more vitamin D and a little less screen time.

Humility. It's kind of hard to go through the birth process and not come out more humble (thank you, nurses, and all healthcare workers for doing the jobs that you do), but once the baby's here, someone else's bodily fluids will now be a part of your daily life (and your wardrobe).

Flexibility. Your days will not go as planned. The sooner you can accept this fact, the better.

Endurance. Motherhood is a marathon, not a sprint. Your days may feel loud and busy and full right now, but someday they won't. As everyone says: the days are long but the years are short.

And most definitely, a strong sense of humor. You can choose to either laugh or cry at a million moments in your momming. Choose the former and be happier.

Granted, yes, there are a few "needs" with a baby. Probably things like: a place for your baby to sleep, a plan for feeding, and a car seat that fits. It was time for us to graduate from our infant car seat to a convertible one, and after researching I went with the Maxi-Cosi Pria 85. I chose this one for a few reasons, two main ones are the weight limit is higher than most, and the cover removes easily for cleaning (because the words "clean" and "car seats" are never in the same sentence unless fresh out of the washer). This one is neither the least expensive nor the most, and it checked all my boxes for comfort, safety, style, and design. Sidenote: I wish I had moved him sooner! He's a pretty big baby, and would cry every time I put him in his infant car seat. (Yes, every-single-time.) but he's hasn't cried yet going into this one (SO glad). I think he may have just needed more space? Sharing in case your baby also hates their infant car seat and maybe they just need to graduate to the next size. It's all a guessing game with babies but I thought this was an interesting observation.

(Caught these two having a moment. Trey thinks Daniel is about the funniest person on earth.)

So, yes, get your baby essentials. But also stock up on your motherhood toolbox. You're going to need those qualities a lot more than that wipe warmer.

This post was written for Maxi-Cosi. We adore this car seat and how their well designed baby products combine the best of style and safety.

BABY SWIM ESSENTIALS

We just got back from our California vacation, and while I was prepping for our trip I realized I needed some baby swim items. I thought I would be more well versed in baby swim gear (considering I grew up in California and was former swim team member, and my mom still swims as her daily form of exercise), but it turns out I was a bit out of touch. I assumed I would need to just grab disposable swim diapers and a baby swimsuit, but after asking the experts (AKA other mom friends and Amazon reviews) I quickly realized there's much more to know for the best experience with a baby in the water.

Swimwear. There are cute suit options all over, but for babies I like the idea of long sleeve rashguards, covering as much skin as possible for the best form of sun protection. These cute striped ones are by SwimZip and we're big fans.

Hat. Something with a wide brim, with back of the neck coverage and an under the neck closure is ideal. This one has a self-clasp which I think stays on better than the self-tie ones.

Swim Diapers. A common misconception here is that swim diapers work just like typical diapers, but I learned that swim diapers are designed to only hold in solids, not liquid (otherwise they'd be absorbing all that pool water also and defeating their purpose). There are two kinds, disposables and reusables, and I'm going with reusables, for what I've read in terms of effectiveness and saving money over the long haul. There's tons of brands and styles, I'm choosing snaps instead of velcro closures so that it doesn't snag on my own swimsuit, and a grow-with-you design for the most bang for my buck. You want them TIGHT for them to work. You also want at least two, so that if one gets messy you don't have to end your swim day. The two companies I found to be the highest rated are by Apple Cheeks and AMP Diapers (both are recommended in the Lucie's List review here), and both fit about 15-35 lbs and I loved them. Fast drying and easy to travel with (the AMP ones even come with that tiny travel bag pictured above), and they double as swim bottoms for babies as well.

Another cool swim company to recommend, Splash About, is based in the UK and carries a new kind of swim diaper, the Happy Nappy. These are made of neoprene material (the same as a wetsuit) and look more like spandex shorts than a diaper, and are cute enough to be worn as-is. I love companies that work to make life and play accessible for everyone, and Splash About also makes swim options that work for bigger children, including adults with disabilities. Beyond swim diapers they make a variety of swim products including the Floatie Swimsuit pictured above. Love that concept of removable floats.

Sunscreen. Of course, right? But strangely not the easiest decision since the chemical content is a little controversial, but after 6 months it's generally advised to use if you're going to be in the sun with your baby for more than a few minutes with exposed skin. Apparently "sunblock" is technically a better term to look for than "sunscreen," since the ingredients used are physical blockers (ie zinc) as opposed to chemical "screens" but in retail the names seem to be used interchangeably and thus the confusion. I've heard the best formulas available right now are by ThinkBaby and ThinkSport (same company and formulas, easily blendable and no weird chemicals) and also I have some friends who love Babyganics.

Life vests. This is more for boating than pool use, but I've heard good things about this classic style one. For pool and learning to swim age I've heard this is the best for arm movement.

Sunglasses. We have these. Not really a necessity but cute (if your baby will keep them on!).

If you're into matching your mini (like me) Raising Wild makes these. The mama suits are functional and fashionable (hello, triangle cut out and high waist), a big win for one pieces.

Wishing you and your bab(ies) lots of fun and safe play in the sun!

Shared in partnership with most companies, some links are affiliate. 

WINTER SURVIVAL GUIDE

Growing up in California, "winter" was an entirely different concept to me than it is now.

During January of my freshman year of in college in the Pacific Northwest, we were just shy of breaking the historical record for most days of rain in a row (33 days in 1953) and I was thisclose to packing my bags and transferring to a southern California school, to trade my rain boots and down jacket in for sunscreen and swimsuits.

But I didn't and I'm glad I stayed. I ended up marrying a Pacific Northwest native, and we're here now with our little family.

When you're somewhere that wouldn't be your first choice, you have to make it your first choice. Here's how I survive winter in the Pacific Northwest:

1. I get outside even when it's cold. I have been terrible at this lately, but it's one of my goals for 2017 and motherhood in general; to get fresh air every day. Even just a few minutes can make such a change in my mindset.

2. I bundle myself. I just now, this year, bought a warm hat. (??) My husband thinks I'm crazy. I never really found a knit one I loved, but these are ethically made and cute. I've also been loving my double insulated jacket and have my eye on these boots.

3. I bundle the baby. I've written about winter gear for babies here, but got a few more items that are worth a mention:

This poncho is meant for babywearing, like with an Ergo, which is Trey's favorite mode of transportation currently and I happily oblige (hands free!), but it also works great as a car seat cover. I love that it comes with a detachable hood that can be used for facing in or out of a baby carrier. Something to note that I've learned recently is that typical down jackets (that buckle under the car seat straps and create bulk) can be dangerous for babies on the off chance they end up in a car accident and need those straps tight to work properly (article by the Car Seat Lady here) so the trick is to bundle them after they've been buckled in, to keep the straps as close to the body as possible, and also warm. This car seat cover does that, and so does this fleece one (if you don't need as warm of coverage as the down one). The arm slots on these help them stay on, instead of a typical blanket that falls off, and they are the grow-with-me sizing to last a few years. I'm also using this warm hat that covers the ears and these boots.

4. I make it a point to work out. I have definitely failed at this one. But I'm convinced endorphins could save the world, at least my little one. I'm trying to find ways to get my heart rate up in the winter when it's cold. I know many people who love their gym memberships, but I am a outside-running kind of girl, so I'm trying to get creative here.

5. I plan a trip. Every February we fly south like little snowbirds, on a purposeful trip to see my grandparents in Southern California and also to get some sun. It doesn't have to be expensive or lavish, many airlines have discounted fares this time of year. Even just having this on the calendar mid-winter is something to look forward to, and sitting by a pool soaking up Vitamin D for a weekend is just enough for me to make it to spring in one piece.

And of course, when all else fails, there's always more coffee and/or wine and maybe even a good old fashioned paper chain. Spring will be here before we know it.

Shared in partnership with 7am Enfant, the winter baby gear brand I love. Thanks for keeping us bundled.